"TOMCAT" BECOMES "LOVECAT"

It's winter! we're all cold.. so Birch and Hamo have decided to tear strips of Tom "TMAC" Mcmillan's Simon Katich rug and wax the super hairy (dead rat look) rig!! auctioning off the hair to Third World Countries... Hopefully TMAC's voluptuous fur will be able to cover at least half of the affected nations, giving Robert Mugabe a break!

The world record holder for the fastest sheep shearer, has come out this week stating that he is not sure whether he can fulfill the promises we delivered to the struggling countries!! we promised alot, over $400,000 to world vision, Promised to build a hospital, Abortion Clinic and 9 years worth of food, THANKS TOM!!


The poor kids from world vision will be very disappointed when they don't receive their cheque delivered Tom! so man up! get rid of the horrid rug cause we're sure that your girlfriend doesn't want to snuggle up next to a wet rat anymore!

peace and love birch and hamo xx

Le Page Shuts The Dunny Door

"In a little cubicle far, far away,
There was a little boy named Andy,
Who wanted to play,
She whipped off her batch,
An exposed her snatch,
Which Andy kindly put away"

Andrew 'Lovemake' LePage, The exuburant young lad from East Craigieburn stunned the world on the weekend by putting away a poor, disadvantaged, drunken and willing participant in a secluded toilet cubicle. The trash-talking GONZILLA, who once said to Hamo 'take her to Lygon, ask her under a candle lit dinner' has defied the odds by doing it dirty ethnic style/reverse cowgirl in the mens toilets. Some would consider this as a step in the wrong direction, trying to turn the corner on his previous altercation with the DEVIL.

Although he is supremely relieved, this one night turned wild has left the 'X man' with a hint of over confidence. Often flapping his gums about how good he is and how easy it was to do it.

Now the Leppa is moving on with this, Birch and Hamo have decided to start a program that will help underprivileged, chronic masturbaters and nerds, lose there V-Plates. The Live-It-Up-Leppa program will start through the treacherous time of schoolies week but we have already helped out a few boys already by setting them up with webcams and buying them ZOO magazines.

In other news, Jamie Anderson has decided to fish hook anus!

Peace and Love Birch and Hamo xx